Nice big pink shirt Jessica Simpson, I know it’s hard to remember where your nipples are when you can’t even feels your tits anymore. Where have you been anyway? I don’t remember the last time I saw you on anything but those tabloid papers and stuff, surely your agent must be working on something, or maybe the sex tape is in the mail. Seems like we’ve reached that juncture. It’s probably time. I wonder if your dad is standing in a small room somewhere sweating over the money he’s losing every second that tape isn’t on the market yet. I can’t stand to see your father in all this pain, can we get to work already, there is plenty of other time to flash the paparazzi.
